Wednesday, April 2, 2008

A Handful of Earth

We go there everyday. Standing among the mango trees, it’s an apt place to escape from everything for a while. Spring came, but unlike the blooms personified by Wordsworth, brought along with it the flying dust which clung to our skins aided by the beads of perspiration, accompanied by the glowing sun, now back from its cold sabbatical.
The advent of April brought more dust and a little more sun. There he was, in his white skull cap and faded yellow t-shirt. His complexion matched the color of the soil he plowed. He must have been around 70, could be 80 too. His white beard made apparent his desire to color it with henna, just like the prophet’s beard. Perhaps, that’s why he still worked, striving to create an opportunity to embark on that pilgrimage, the sacred duty of every devout Muslim, lest the arms of time embrace him to the depth of the earth. Maybe the plowing reminded him of the grave that awaited him, informing him about his mortality, the cycle which continues in its everlasting endeavor. Probably condemned to this task by an overzealous official of the horticulture department, his actions appeared to be fruitless and in vain, creating tiny canals to the trees, the water for which might never appear.
He plowed, using his hands to smoothen the base, occasionally standing to relieve his ageing back. I imagined the crackling sound as I watched him stretch his muscles. He would look heavenwards, as if begging for a little more time. During afternoons, a bag hanging on one of the low branches would reveal a tiny tin tiffin, containing a few chappatis and an onion. He ate slowly, savoring every morsel to the fullest. His restlessness wouldn’t allow him a nap, and he would rise from the ground, only to get covered with the same soil again. This continued for days. Apparently oblivious to us, he would dig and plow. Soon his presence started going unnoticed to me, my restless mind having found its interests in newer mysteries. Also, I confess that the predictability of his actions had begun to bore me and my empathy. Weeks went by and the temperature continued with its climb. The mango tree shielded us from the sun’s wrath, but the loo had begun to make its presence felt. Meanwhile he plowed on. One such afternoon while we entertained ourselves with frivolous talk, he cleared the mud with his hands, making a cup out of them and discarding them outside the channels. The fruit of weeks of hard labor was at the verge of being realized. I noticed the newfound energy in his actions as he went about finishing his work. The loo didn’t seem to have any effect on him. And then, he collapsed, loudly gasping for air. We rushed to his side. His eyes stared at the sky, pained yet calm in a strange way. “Allah”, he uttered softly. A tear left the corner of his eye a moment before life deserted him. In his hand, he still clutched a handful of earth.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Coffee House

Looking out of the glass door with the wooden frame, it feels like fate has led me to a time long gone by. Seated on brown rexine chairs I sip my coffee, tingling my sweet tooth in the process. I gaze at the soothing blue walls, and while I’m at it, I can’t help but marvel at how time here has truly frozen. The chipped floor has lost its shine long ago, but in its muddy complexion I notice the footprints of generations which have walked on it, in the thirsty endeavor to enjoy a relaxing hour or two. The open kitchen door allows a constant flow of verbal obscenities and the racket of wrestling utensils, a surprising, yet welcome change from the prevailing Enrique.
Different sorts of people walk in, but in their diversity I sense certain similarities. I strive to identify them, but fail miserably. Babus from nearby government offices, retired college professors, young couples in search of a cheap joint, a few loafers like me and my friend. Some walk in with a look of unconcealed skepticism and take a prompt turn towards the exit. And then, there are those who have left their days behind, or vice-versa. Grey wisps of hair, thick glasses, loosely fitting shirts and leather sandals, they come in and plonk themselves here in a manner as if one was in a friend’s drawing room for an evening cup of tea. The waiters greet them with their orders (which by the way, aren’t ordered, but understood) and toothy grins of familiarity. Perhaps these men come here to escape the profanities that the world beyond the door offers in abundance, or maybe, just to spend another evening as themselves. They seem to be a part of this place just like the chairs, the noisy fans, the poster of the south Indian lass on the wall behind the counter, and the waiters of course.
During these contemplations, my eyes wander to the glass door for the umpteenth time, only to be met by huge shades, tight jeans and rebonded hair walking past. Smiling, I get up, to cross the door and walk decades ahead in one step.

Friday, January 18, 2008

And it is 'He' you bow to.

Silent screams and pleading
Amidst tolling bells of preaching
And sightless beacons claiming
Beholding a path for all those wary
Of crushed souls and crumbled hopes
Of parched throats and hungry woes
To those who kneeled, begged and cried
Were assured persistence of all wrath and denial
Those preachers attest opening of doors
I demand they glance beneath their robes
Those hypocrites exhorting peace and love
Blinding us mortals for their greedy lust
Burn them at the stake before
They make our humanity their unworthy whore
I stumble, I fall, I stand again
Owing no particular gratitude to His hidden self
And while those who stoop and plead
I stand and mend all that made me bleed
I gasp, I pant, I puff and wheeze
But then these arms build what the eye sees
And while you may resume banging 'His' door
May I suggest you save your breath and time
For 'His' deep slumber you shall not breach
Your skeptical eyes will look me down
But then I'm not the man who stood on that rock
'His' saviour, 'His' follower, or the one 'He' mocked
And now I'll proceed to focus on all that comprises 'me'
While those unconvinced, I beg to bow and plead.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Sitting in class one day...

And it is here I sit
In the company of hollow statues
United in an endeavour for darkness
The dazzling darkness that I too must attain
An idea conceived amidst all anonymity
Struggling to stand apart
Striving to gel in
Perhaps for a selfish cause
Or maybe to realise the self
Present in the masses a blinding ray
Have to unprove the proven, rise the fallen.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

THE DARKNESS FOLLOWS THE LIGHT
THE BECKONING HORIZON BEGINS TO DISSAPPEAR
FOR DO CERTAIN THINGS JUST COME,
TO VANISH AFTER A MOMENT OF BLISS?
AND IS THE TRUTH JUST A PERSISTENT ILLUSION?OR DOES ONE HAVE TO SUBMERGE IN LIES?
TO OPEN ONE’S SELF TO THE TRUTH WITHIN
AND AM I A PRODUCT OF MY CONSCIENCE
OR MY CONSCIENCE A PRODUCT OF ME?
FOR WHAT I SEEK IS BEYOND THAT HORIZON
THE ‘PANDORA’S BOX’ OF MY DESIRES
THE UTOPIA OF MY DREAMS
BEING WHERE PERFECTIONS’S IN ABUNDANCE
A NEW MEANING GIVEN TO MERE EXISTENCE
AND ALL THE DECEIVERS DENIED ACCESS
A WORLD WHERE THE CYNIC WOULD DO JUST FINE
AND THE WEB CALLED RELATIONS IS CLEARLY DEFINED
AND THIS IS WHAT MY DESIRES SPEAK
AND THIS IS WHAT MY HEART SEEKS
THE TRUTH HIDDEN, AND THE LIES REVEALED

Recognising the pain within

THE NUMBNESS ACCOMPANYING THE BITTER CHILL
THE HOLLOWNESS OF SWALLOWING AN EMPTY TRUTH
STRUGGLING WITH A FOE WHICH REFUSES TO REVEAL
ITSELF
STRENGTHENING A TIE, A COMPOSITION OF WITHERED
FIBRE,
AND BROKEN LINKS, IN THAT OLD RUSTED CHAIN
THE DEAD LEAVES DANCING WITH THE COLD WINDS
A CELEBRATION OF FREEDOM, OR A SORDID IMITATION
OF THE PAST?
THE SCREECHING PROGRESS OF SOLITARY EXISTENCE
PAINFULLY CONFINED, PAINFULLY SUCCEEDED
BY AN ILLUSION OF MONOTONY
AND WELL PREDICTED HIERARCHY
OF EVENTS ENDEAVOURING TO CONTINUE
AN INHERITED ADDICITON, TO IMAGINED SUPERIORITY

Wishful thinking

AS I SIT HERE WONDERING
ATTEMPTING TO BE OBLIVIOUS OF MY SORROUNDINGS
SUBMERGING MYSELF IN THE COOL LAGOON OF YOUR THOUGHTS
THE DESIRE FOR YOUR PRESENCE
CONSPICUOUSLY PRESENT ON MY FACE
FOR SUCH IS THE MAGIC OF BEING WITH YOU
FOR SUCH IS THE EFFECT OF BEING WITH YOU
AN ANTIDOTE TO THE FATAL STING CALLED SOCIETY
A SOBERING EFFECT TO THE DRUNKENESS OF BEING EMPTY
THE LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS OF ENDLESS UNCERTAINITY
AND AS TIME PASSES, AND THE HOLLOWNESS EXPANDS
THE HUNGER AND THE CRAVING CALLED ‘YOU’
COMPEL ME TO LEAVE MY COCOON
LOOKING FOR YOU AMONG ALL SO CROOKED
MY EYES SEARCH, MY HEART SEEKS
WITH ARMS WIDE OPEN, I AWAIT THE MOMENT I’LL EMBRACE YOU
AND THEN I REALISE THAT YOU AREN’T AROUND
A HEAVY HEART, AND SHUT EYES
I DRAG BACK, TO THE WARM CRADLE OF YOUR THOUGHTS